Rollercoster

Look at the time
Its 3 in the morning
Checking whats mine
Looking for the meaning

I laugh, I sing and I smile
But can u hear the pain?
I love, I live and I care
Can u release my pain?

Its cold, its dark and its lonely
Surreal and scary
Its mean, its rough and its tough
But i wont go down without a fight

Semper Fi

Its Latin and it means " always faithful ". This is a simple 2 words but hard to practice. If there is a tattoo i am getting on me is having this 2 words carve onto my bare skin and have them beautifully displayed.

How do we do this? Why is it so hard to apply? i have no answers, just questions. I guess we will never know.

Thank God its Friday! Not

A usual Friday at work and i saw a long lost fren online so we chated. It was so wonderful to hear good news on a gloomy day. He is expecting a baby in June and career wise, done so well for him self. All those hard work paid off. Hahaha.. he is the core reason i have many SG aquaintance.

Look at the time and it was time to leave office for a work dinner with the senior team. They were all drinking and i was amaze with myself how i could control my urge to take a sip of wine to taste those heavenly fragrance wine, and to make things tough was there was 3 bottles to sample ;) but NO! i stayed diciplined and refused the tempting offer. Wine would be nice to take my mind away from all this torture and messy situation. Making believe again, walls cracked and need to be restructured all over again.

Well, i guess, i am gonna be a champion and deal this issues head on with a clear head. hmmm... guess that is part and puzzle of being a grown woman

Wish me luck

Reality seeps in

I woke up this morning feeling really tired and dead physically, but my mind is motivating my body to cheer up and to feel alive. So they meet with a agreement. My feet agree to drag me to carry on the day but telling my mind do not expect my feet to be dancing away.

I guess once we overcome the shock and reality sets, we find way to naturally tune the tempo the the background music that is playing. Someone famous once say " Life is like a stage and we are merely the actors". Line chg, plots chg and like it or not, it happens. So many thinks runs thru my head now on my actions last nite. Is that right or not? What if i have done it otherwise? I guess i will never know, but i know i have made a decision and this will be a decision for me to live with.

The journey do not end yet until the day i blow out my last breath. So i guess, as i am still pursuing this odyssey, i will fall and get up and learn along the way. I do sincerely hope that all this experience will make me a more stronger, graceful and wise woman.

Wake up call

There is awakening everyday but the question is are we sensitive enough to realize it. And even if u do, what are you gonna do about it? I was surprise wt my actions. It's been sometime now since I look deep into me n I ask my self, what was the most exciting I have done past year? We easily falls into a world of routine n get stuck in it. This wake up call made me realize change is DESPRATE n I m looking in the mirror n I want to start with her.

I need to be stronger n put things into perspective on what is really important n wat do I need? Wat do I wanna achieve? So wish me luck as I clear my backlog of things I want to do but keep putting it off.